11 Vital Things You Should Tell Your Future Partner
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Failing to tell our future partners certain things can be almost as damaging to the relationship as cheating. If you want increase the likelihood of having a stable relationship with your future partner, be sure to make the following things as clear as possible, as early as possible.
Tell them exactly what level of relationship you’re looking for
The most important thing that most people neglect to tell their partner when they should is the exact level of the relationship that they’re actually searching for. Clearly communicating the type of relationship that you’re after will save both you and your partner from a lot of avoidable heartache in both the short run and the long run.
Tell them what your boundaries are
We owe it to ourselves and our partners to tell them exactly what it is that we can and can’t tolerate. Letting your partner know the things that you’re not okay with demonstrates the level of trust that you have in them to respect you. Telling them what your boundaries are is not only honest, but lowers the chance of a forming a codependent relationship.
Tell them what your career plans are
One of the main things that can sabotage a perfectly healthy relationship is one partner abruptly revealing that their career path will require the other partner to completely uproot their lives to stay together. To spare your partner the stress of dealing with the sudden knowledge that your career needs to come first, tell them what your professional goals are from day one; this will at least give them time to prepare for the the possibility you might have to make significant personal lifestyle changes in the future.
Tell them how much you travel
If you develop a close relationship with someone in a place that you’re only staying in temporarily, then it’s imperative for you to let them know that you may not be around forever. Nobody likes to be left in the cold by a globetrotting partner who never said a word about their passion for traveling the world.
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Tell them about your friends and family
Unless you’re hiding the existence of your partner from everyone that you know and love, then there will certainly come a time when they cross paths with the people close to you. It’s a good idea to at least give your partner an inkling of a idea about what your friends and family are like, as this will lower the chance of any embarrassing faux paus upon the initial meeting.
Tell them some of the less flattering things in your history
If there’s something in your past that will undoubtedly have a big impact on the way that you and your partner spend time with one another, then you mustn’t delay letting them know as quickly as possible. Consider the Streisand effect when it comes to your relationship and the less-than-flattering things about your past. The more you try to cover it up, the worse it will be when it eventually does come to light.
Tell them them your weaknesses
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You need to let your partner know your weak points so that they understand the kind of things that you’ll struggle with. If you try to overcompensate by not making it clear what your personal challenges are, then your future partner may not be as well-prepared to help you when need their support the most. Humanizing yourself in the eyes of a partner who truly loves you will not make them love you any less.
Tell them your obscure favorite things
In addition to learning about the things that your partner likes, don’t forget to let your partner know all of the little things that make you smile. They may genuinely want to be aware of the less-than-obvious things that you like so that they can surprise you in the future, but they may not be sure how to ask; make it a bit easier on them and tell them upfront.
Tell them that you trust them
Even if you think your partner should intuitively know that you trust them, hearing you actually say it can make a world of difference. Give them the peace of mind to know that they have your faith in them, and it will inspire them to be more faithful to you in return.
Tell them what you can and can’t do for them
Your partner needs to know exactly what they can depend on you for. We’d love to be able to give our partners the world, but this is unrealistic, and pretending that you can do so only leads to disappointment. Be honest with them and tell them exactly where your power to please them begins and ends.
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Tell them how much you care
Much like telling your partner that you trust them, telling your partner that you care about them is one of the things that seems obvious but is still important to actually say. Putting your care for them in words, alongside with the actions, will leave a deeper imprint on their heart.
In summary, these are the most important things to tell your partner from the get-go:
Tell them exactly what level of relationship you’re looking for
Tell them what your boundaries are
Tell them what your career plans are
Tell them how much you travel
Tell them about your friends and family
Tell them some of the less flattering things in your history
Tell them them your weaknesses
Tell them your obscure favorite things
Tell them that you trust them
Tell them what you can and can’t do for them
Tell them how much you care
Remember, not enforcing boundaries with your partner is one of the biggest relationship mistakes that you could make. Happy couples are couples that can communicate openly, even regarding things that aren’t pleasant. Prioritize honesty first, and you and your future partner can have the strongest possible bond.
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