When we’re young and envision our future relationships, we often dream of a romantic and happy partnership with our future significant other. In the early days of marriage or commitment, everything might seem smooth sailing, but as time goes on, reality can sometimes contradict our dreams. Let’s not point fingers at one gender or the other, as there are common mistakes that both men and women make in their daily lives, which can be detrimental to a relationship. Before unhappiness takes hold, take a look at the list below and try to avoid these behaviors:
1. Expecting your partner to act exactly as you want
One of the most common causes of arguments between couples is the expectation that our partners should think, act, and behave exactly as we do. However, differences in opinions, beliefs, values, and judgments are natural in any relationship. It’s essential to recognize that your partner doesn’t have to be a mirror image of you. Give them the freedom to be themselves, and remember that it’s about both of you as a couple, not just you individually.
2. Expecting your partner to make you happy every day
If you find yourself unhappy because your partner doesn’t constantly make you happy, it’s time to step out of the fairytale mindset. No one can be responsible for someone else’s happiness on a daily basis. A healthy and happy relationship involves individuals who have chosen to be content on their own, and then come together to share that happiness. Happiness is a personal choice that comes from within.
3. Assuming your partner is a mind reader
As much as we might wish our partners could read our minds, the reality is they can’t. Your desires and thoughts might be clear to you, but they won’t be to your partner unless you communicate them clearly. Learn to express your expectations and desires openly, and encourage your partner to do the same.
4. Fighting in the heat of the moment
We all experience moments of extreme anger, but engaging in an argument when emotions are boiling over rarely leads to anything positive. When both you and your partner are angry, it becomes challenging to think rationally and empathize with each other. It’s crucial to avoid arguments in the heat of the moment. Instead, take a break and come back to discuss the issue when you’ve both cooled down.
5. Being disrespectful or snarky
Respect is the foundation of any healthy relationship. Learn to control your temper and avoid being rude or snippy with your partner. Remember, they are your chosen partner, and taking out your anger on them is counterproductive and hurtful. If you’re angry, it’s your problem to handle, not your partner’s. Keep your tone polite and treat your partner with the same respect you would expect in return.
6. Prioritizing being right over being in love
Of course, there will be times when your partner is wrong or makes mistakes. However, if you prioritize being right and constantly point out their errors, it can hurt your partner’s feelings and lead to arguments. Sometimes, it’s better to trust and support your partner, even when they make mistakes. Choose love and understanding over the need to always be right.
By being mindful of these common mistakes and actively working to avoid them, couples can create a more harmonious and fulfilling relationship, fostering happiness and growth together.