When you meet someone new, it’s their attitude that will make you either like them or hate them. Contrary to what most people believe, dating and being in love isn’t just about the ridiculously gorgeous bone structure or the wads of cash you throw at VIP clubs and Eden-like travel spots. While looks and resources are indeed attractive, it’s an attitude that makes or breaks the relationship in the long run. Irresistible people are irresistible not because they were born into a lifestyle that allowed them to thrive, but because over their lifetime they’ve accumulated habits that are desirable in a person.
People who are independent are statistically more attractive than those who require a partner in their lives. These people are not needy and can take care of themselves, a highly respectable and rare trait in a species where socialization and a sense of belonging are widely viewed as second nature. If you end up always needing your significant other to be there for you every time there is difficulty in your life, you’ll end up exhausting them and turning your relationship into a toxic nightmare, at least for your significant other.
So, how does one foster independence from a relationship? For starters, identify what you look for and need in a relationship. Is it stability? Affection? Attention? Or are you merely following a trend? Being self-aware of such things can save you from a ton of a headache and heartache from relationships that are not built on solid foundation. Knowing what you want and being able to relay that to your partner is healthy for your relationship. For instance, if you are looking for a serious relationship, tell him/her “You can date other men/women, but I am looking for a serious, long-term relationship”. This implies what you are looking for in a relationship without sounding too needy or suffocating.
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