5. WILLINGNESS TO COMPROMISE
Though it’s important to have common interests, you won’t always see eye-to-eye. There are bound to be disagreements. At these times, flexibility will keep the peace. Butting heads in stubbornness leads to exasperation.
Here’s a simple definition of compromise. It’s finding the best solution for both of you.
Evaluating Your Own Flexibility
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You also need to assess your own elasticity. Are you able to gracefully bend? Can you yield to your sweetheart’s opinion? If it’s hard to answer “Yes,” here are considerations that can help:
- Not getting your way doesn’t mean you’re defeated. It shows you’re willing to acknowledge other possibilities.
- A spirit of compromise doesn’t involve winning or losing. It focuses on what will make you both happy.
- Being open-minded feels good! It diffuses the stress of a sticky situation. Take a deep breath during tense moments to gain a sense of expansion. It will widen your perspective.
- Put yourself in your partner’s shoes. This mental shift can make all the difference.
- Small variations in opinion aren’t worth debating. Pettiness will sap the strength of your relationship. Do you war over which TV show to watch? Save deliberations for issues that truly matter. Concerns about career, kids, and health merit negotiation.
- Compromise creates balance in a relationship. It conveys respect and appreciation for your mate’s point of view. Once you’re fluent in considering your partner’s ideas, compromise will come easily to you.
Compassion is the desire to ease suffering. The ability to feel someone’s pain spurs you to help them. If your mate is compassionate, they’ll take care of you when you’re sick. They’ll cut you some slack when your mind is off-track. Your partner will earnestly try to make life easier for you. Compassion is clothed as:
- comforting words
- a shoulder to cry on
- a gentle touch
Kindness is the cornerstone of a loving relationship. Compassion creates a safe place in your relationship where you can relax.
Here’s an exercise for developing compassion. When your lovebird is upset, look deeply into their eyes. Try to sense your sweetie’s emotions. Then ask what they’re feeling. Now think of what you can do to help them feel better.