The Single Most Damaging Word That Can Ruin Your Relationship
In most relationships, there are often a number of different words that are thrown around in the heat of an argument. Empty threats are often made, which can range from ending the relationship to leaving permanently. Although it can be easy to use hurtful words when dealing with conflict, the word “should” will still have a harmful effect that can have long-term ramifications.
When it comes to how you view your significant other, it can be easy to always think of what they lack in and need to improve in as a partner. For women, it can be easy to assume that men should be more romantic, help more around the house, or open up more emotionally for a closer bond and connection. Men can often expect women to be less clingy or reduce their spending habits. On each side, saying the word “should” consistently can ruin the relationship and cause more damage than expected.
Using the word “should” is dangerous due to the expectations that it immediately puts on another individual and can make it easy to see the person as lacking in their commitment or what they bring to the relationship. Instead of having a positive perspective of the person, it can be easy to see them as someone who is not competent enough. Although the word “should” may seem minor, it’s the complete opposite of being thankful for the individual and for what they are successful at as a partner. This can easily cause turmoil and bitterness to develop for a relationship that will likely fail after a period of time.
Although it’s normal to have expectations of a partner, the expectations can often be unrealistic or out of reach. According to www.marriagebuilders.com, women tend to have more needs than men, resulting in men feeling like it’s impossible for them to meet every request or demand from their spouse. This often results in divorce due to two partners who do not feel respected or appreciated with the factors that they are actually strong in.
A recent study reports that most marriage problems can come from wanting your spouse to be perfect instead of finding gratitude for who they are as a human being and spouse.